Daggers & Dices: O-Juice
Daggers & Dices is set in a slightly anachronistic fantasy world that reflects our own. It follows Marko, an Elven swordsman, as he navigates this world as a mercenary of sorts. He’s accompanied by Tia, a human Cleric passionate about progressive magic, Thyrim, a crude mountain dwarf who prides himself on his traditional values, and Eldreth, a draconic humanoid (Drakon) wizard constantly fed up with the group’s antics. Together, they embark on adventures that challenge their bonds and teach valuable lessons about the world they live in.
Scene 1
INT. TAVERN – NIGHT
The tavern resides in a large, populated city. It has crude decor and a wooden interior, with subpar hygienic spaces. Commoners and lowlives, clad in loose and baggy clothing, drink their souls away at the tables.
MARKO, TIA, and ELDRETH sit at a table with drinks in their hands. They take sips of cheap ales and bourbon— nothing too fancy.
ELDRETH
Wait, so why didn’t we invite Thyrim to Vulture Wing Wednesday again?
MARKO
Bro, you know DAMN well why we didn’t bring him.
TIA
Last week, he suplexed that Arcane Studies student who screamed “Free Plumentine” outside the bar.
ELDRETH
Oh yeah, I almost forgot about that.
MARKO
I’m not in the mood to cover any more hospital bills, so I told him I had Kovingitis and had to cancel. I’m sure he’s just vibing back at camp.
ELDRETH
Still though, I think we’re doing him dirty here.
TIA
We’re doing THYRIM dirty? Are you tripping right now?
ELDRETH
No! I just think regardless of character, no one should be denied a seat at the table. To take away that would be a violation of their freedoms, something everyone deser—
BARTENDER approaches their table with a large plate of wings.
BARTENDER
Here y’all are. Enjoy.
Bartender leaves.
ELDRETH
(Elated) Ok, fuck all of that. I’m about to tear up this whole plate!
Eldreth takes a bunch of wings for himself.
MARKO
Yo bro, chill. Let us get som—
ELDRETH
(Eating wings) Man, it feels like I’m snorting rocks right now! Nothing could ruin this mome—
PATRON barges into the tavern.
PATRON
Everyone, O-Juice Shamson just died!
Eldreth stops eating. Murmurs travel throughout the tavern.
MARKO
(Mildly surprised) Oh shit, O-Juice Shamson died? I forgot he existed for a bit.
ELDRETH
(Shocked) Wait, how?!
PATRON
They said it was prostate cancer!
ELDRETH
(Shocked) Ain’t no way one of the KFL OGs got killed by ball disease!
MARKO
(Chewing on a tough piece of wing) The KFL?
ELDRETH
Kingdom Football League! Don’t you keep up with sports?! (Anguished) Goddamnit, Vulture Wing Wednesday’s ruined! What are we gonna do?!
TIA
What do you mean, ‘What are WE gonna do?’
ELDRETH
A KFL legend just passed! It doesn’t feel right doing Vulture Wing Wednesday now!
TIA
Hold up, are we talking about the guy who also stabbed his wife to death twenty years ago?
ELDRETH
Allegedly.
TIA
(Argumentative) The fuck you mean, “allegedly”?
ELDRETH
They acquitted him at the Langelis Regional Court! What are you talking about?!
TIA
You hear anything about what their marriage was like? He had plenty of motive for doing it!
ELDRETH
Motive isn’t evidence! They literally proved he didn’t do shit!
TIA
The court doesn’t always get everything right!
ELDRETH
You know what isn’t right? The size of the gloves the killer wore. It didn’t fit O-Juice. That’s why he couldn’t have done it!
MARKO
(Still chewing on wing) I am so out of the loop right now.
TIA
O-Juice did it. He told one of his friends he did. And it’s disgusting how no one wants to talk about it!
ELDRETH
It happened twenty years ago! Why is it relevant now?
TIA
Because he just died and you’re glamorizing a murderer!
ELDRETH
He isn’t just a murderer! He was a KFL MVP and won the Heinman Cup! You know how many quarterbacks make it to Heinman?!
TIA
He isn’t JUST a murderer? So you agree that he’s one?
ELDRETH
WHOA, WHOA, WHOA, that’s not what I meant! I just think he’s a driving force in Acireman sports!
TIA
You know what else he drove? That white Bronco horse he rode on the 405 Trailway!
MARKO
(Gnawing on wing) I’m starting to think this might’ve gotten out of hand.
TIA (CONT’D)
He’s a guilty man! And you’re just gonna overlook that because he owns a cup?
ELDRETH
It’s not JUST a cup! You know Berdock Sonders and Markus Elon won it too?
TIA
(Confused) Who are they?
ELDRETH
Do you know ANYTHING about sports?! And why does any of that matter? The man just died!
TIA
And to that, I say good riddance!
Eldreth rises. He pulls out his wizard staff, which beams with light. He aims it at Tia.
ELDRETH
You saying that for O-Juice or yourself?
Tia rises and raises her hands at Eldreth. She prepares to cast some fucked up spells on this man.
TIA
For you, actually.
Marko rises and gets between the two of them.
MARKO
OKAY, knock it off! Both of you!
TIA ELDRETH
Tell that to him! Tell that to her!
MARKO
Look, I know this is a sensitive topic. And there are A LOT of different feelings about this news. (To Eldreth) People we look up to die every day. It happens. (To Tia) Horrible people get away with horrible shit all the time. It’s not news. (To both) Eventually, we move on. It’s Vulture Wing Wednesday, guys. No one starts shit on Vulture Wing Wednesday. Hell, that was the whole reason we didn’t bring Thy—
THYRIM (O.S.)
What was the whole reason, pixie bastard?
They all turn to the entrance. THYRIM enters the tavern.
THYRIM
Now, I know this ain’t what I think it is.
MARKO
(Anxious) Thyrim, this isn’t what it looks like—
THYRIM
(Agitated) Looks to me like y’all are here for Vulture Wing Wednesday…and told me y’all got Kovingitis. But I don’t believe in that voodoo, hippie, socialist, liberal bullshit so I came to see it for myself. And imagine my surprise…
MARKO
Thyrim, listen, we did it because we can’t have you beating up anyone else who says—
STUDENT barges into the tavern. They carry a “Free Plumentine” sign.
STUDENT
Free Plumentine! These injustices carried out upon their land and people will not stand! We must catch everyone who profits from these crimes and—
THYRIM
How about you catch an elbow drop to the throat?!
Thyrim punches Student in the crotch, forcing them to the ground. As he readies the elbow drop, Marko rushes towards them.
MARKO
(Panicked) THYRIM, NO!
END.
