Seasonal Reality Check
🎶All I want for Christmas is…🎶
Waterproof boots with a fuzzy lining.
An actual coat because my ass thought a couple sweatshirts would be enough
And
Someone who will share a shed of feelings for me (someone who won’t run away)
No one prepares you for the reality of living in New York and throughout the holiday season. From the movies and television shows you would imagine that between November and the coming of the next year’s spring would be filled with romance and drama - the good and rewarding kind, of course. But expectations come to a sudden halt as soon as temperatures dip below forty and your landlord continues to wait to switch on the building’s heat.
So where’s the action and the energy of the holiday season we always see in the media? Instead of my peers and I barely making it to Thanksgiving break after a wreck of midterms, someone’s head should be stuck in a turkey and the fire alarm should be going off during our Friendsgiving dinner a la Friends style.. I should be reaching for my uber-specific coffee order at the same time as my nonchalant and mysterious lover - who is also the CEO of the company I just started working at. My best friend should suddenly recognize his feelings for me when we spend our first holidays away from each other - thus he flies here to declare what has been burdening his heart. But no. That is not the case.
Fact of the matter, a New York winter is not as romantic nor conveniently magical as we’ve grown to recognize as a motif in romantic plotlines. When Kathleen Kelly is able to step out of her little book store, effortlessly beautiful in her turtleneck, in You’ve Got Mail, I question what I’m doing wrong. And the rain! No one prepares you for the awkward rainy season between autumn and winter here - you could easily get swept up in a gutter current. Holly Golightly is the standard of femme fashionista in NYC when she smooches George Peppard under the pouring rain in Breakfast at Tiffany’s, yet I’d fight a man who’d try and keep out in that type of weather.
Nevertheless, the romance of the city remains strong. New York is adored and recognized as one of the world’s central hubs of life and culture and the tourists come in waves during the holiday season because of what they see in the movies. From the annual Macy’s Day Thanksgiving Parade to the New Year’s Eve Times Square Ball Drop, there are a slew of events that this place has to offer, but living in the city makes you forget the beauty behind it all. The rose colored glasses are removed after that first rent payment, the first catcall, and perhaps even the first whiff of the sewer heat.
No one can deny the commercialization of the holiday season. Here in NY, we applaud the light shows put on display by the luxurious department store Saks in the Rockefeller Center and stand in awe at the beautiful wreaths decorating the Macy’s in Herald Square. This is extremely prevalent online as well. As soon as twelve o’one hit the clocks on November first, Mariah Carey posted her TikTok making it acceptable for the masses to start celebrating Christmas and listening to “All I Want For Christmas Is You”, adding to her bag in the process. Ms. Mariah Carey has become a master at marketing herself as the Mrs Claus of the holiday season and it’s estimated that she makes about $2.5 million yearly since the song originally came out in 1994. Not only does she make unimaginable profit off of the season, but so do big companies like Starbucks, which has made their holiday cup designs a fervor of discussion and Yankee Candle, which encapsulates the scent of nostalgia - Peppermint Pinwheel and Christmas Cookie in particular gets me reminiscing. These capitalistic power moves have taught and trained us as consumers to feign our spirit and excitement, and especially in NY, ignore the dismal nature of the winter season itself.
Ironically enough, the wonderment of the city’s operative features and culture are the same factors that can make seasonal depression even more impactful on its inhabitants. The cold weather alone can make individuals want to hunker down in their apartments, hiding from Jack Frost. The problem with that though is how daylight in the city is impossible to grasp. Since there are skyscrapers lining every block, there is a high probability that your little window only gets to shine a few hours of sunlight into the room a day. Something about the darkness shuts down all considerations of productivity and energy.
Secondly, it’s so easy to feel alone in the city of dodgy glances and fast pacers- no one has time to care. This is a year-round thing, but is more heavily emphasized during the holiday season when individuals miss their homes and families. It might even be the fact that the movies with NYC as a supportive character set us up to believe in an epic romance and a story in which Hallmark will want to reproduce - with cheesy titles like Mistletoe Over Manhattan and A New Year's Resolution. It’s not easy to find a partner to go skating with you in the Rockerfeller center and to kiss as the Times Square ball falls to its final destination. So these images of love and expectations of corny connections unfulfilled can leave a weighty disappointment in New Yorkers and thus an opaque version of the holiday scenes we used to adore.
While many picture the holiday season in the city to be filled with glamor and mystique, the reality of living here has hit me in a different way than I’ve always dreamt and have been taught to romanticize. Sometimes I still expect an exciting dinner with the cast of Friends and the confession of a lifetime like the one Harry gave Sally. But it’s not as simple as existing in the big city for these moments to happen. In reality, we have to actively fight against the encroaching influence of seasonal depression and surround ourselves with the corny-lighthearted events the city has to offer, as sick of tourists we may be. Existing in the seasonal reality is a bigger struggle than what we consume, but there is still the possibility of falling in love in the city we call home.
